In Aknowledging Death We Affirm Life-Musing's of a Recovering Addict

So as a PLWHA that has lost many family & friends in his life's journey,i have recently been invited to attend a workshop on multiple death-coping with loss & the grieveing process.This is something that i have alot of personal experience in,as i have lost my dad,brother,grampa,daughter,mother,aunt & too many friends,ex girlfriends to OD's,various diseases-cancer & aids being the main ones.I am sure i will learn about the dyeing process the more i live.So many folks have been killed in the name of GOD-religeous persicution =inquisition.Man has now devised ways to kill off whole cities of men,or to drop a bomb down the chimney of a building.Man's inhumanity to his fellow man never ceases to amaze & sicken me.Africans killing africans because they are from a differing tribe-genocide.The list is endless really... religeon teach PEACE & LOVE &FORGIVENESS?Than Y all this WAR?Isreal is attacking UN positions at the time of this writing...now missles from lebenon fall upon that country...opening a 2 front.R the Isreali's going to invade their too?I doubt it.They have an army to defend themselves.NOT that they prob wouldnt win.After all R not the Isreali's GOD's people?Except when they were to be taught a lesson,then GOD would have a foriegn army overtake & enslave the peoples!So many peoples have been killed in the name of GOD.Has GOD asked for this>?I highly doubt it.Peace n love is what we are supposed to be liveing & preaching & practicing isn't it?I mean if we R christians or muslims true to our faith-PEACE & LOVE should be what we wage-not wars n walls! PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS EH FOLKS!!!

Trying to Live Positively in a Negative World-

So ya it isn't easy being positive in a negative world these day's especially around the holiday season,as this is the time for family & friends to join each other in celebration of our Lord's birth.At least this is the premise,as i think christmas has lost its true meaning & has become far too comercial.As my folks are both deceased,along with a brothr & daughter my holidays have turned into nothing but misory for me as i stay by myself alone in my apt.Losing wieght isn't a problem for me as long as i smoke pot.Being HIV+ is hard enough,throw in addiction problems & a few others n well its no wonder i am single & alone.I have this woman jenifer taylor in my mind & i cannot escape her!She is so beautifull,breathtakingly so pretty i can now see Y angels would want to mate with human females.Of course she doesn't know i exist,isn't that the way of things eh?I am far too nervous to contact her,or talk to her,I am sure yu all know the feeling U get in your stomack when U R in love & U get close to that person?Ya u want to upchuk right?Well i look at her pics & it seems like she is looking right at me,& no one else!I know this isn't so,though,& theres not much of a chance of me ever getting a woman of her beauty,but its still nice to dream eh!k folks i will sign off now,& wish everyone a safe & prosperous new year filled with PEACE,LOVE & HAPPINESS!!!

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SAFE SEX SAVES LIVES SO SAVE A LIFE TODAY!THE LIFE YOU SAVE COULD BE YOUR OWN IF YOUR SMART & USE A CONDOM!!!!PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS EH FOLKS!!!third parties may be placing and reading cookies on your users' browser, or using web beacons to collect information as a result of ad serving on your website.We apoligize for any & all inconvenience that may incure, Yours truly James JC gough

Micro-chipping HIV+ Patient's Dangerous

Micro chipping HIV+ patients in ANY country is a dangerous !!If goverments start doing this,WHO will want to be tested for HIV-AIDs?This can & will set the whole movement back 20 yrs.We have made huge strides in finding meds to fight the hiv virus.Sure we still have a very long way to go,but,we must keep our faith strong & our hope alive,Trust in GOD & we will survive & thrive!Being HIV+ myself,not only is this AGAINST my religeon & beliefs,(666=number of the beast hand or forhead)but i believe this is setting a dangerous precedent.We MUST NOT allow micro-chipping of anyone,let alone those suffering from HIV-Aids.Where is the compassion here?Empathy?Peoples living with hiv are our sisters & brothers,fathers,mothers,aunts & uncles,grandpa's & grandma's!Will we wage WAR on them just because they smoke weed to help stop the nasea,vomiting,pain & generally make life alot easier to live with HIV-AIDs.PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS EH FOLS!!!

Court Remanded 1 Wk For Posession Charge for HIV+ Person,ME!

So ya,as i could not find any Dr to sign for my medical marijuana application form i have had to try n score weed at various locations,with various results.From ripped off,to getting great weed,to getting raided!Sure wish they would concentrate on crack as that shit seem's to be all over the place these days!Weed is hard to come by it seems in this city is sudbury.The ONLY HIV specialist DR Sandre is a great person that has saved many many lives.I once showed him disrespect out of desperation ,but thats another story.I am here blogging about how hard it is finding a DR that will sign for medical weed,& its the same answer,its an HIV issue & your DR looking after your HIV should be taking care of it,not me.=(other DRs)}So because i live in sudbury Northern Ontario,i am refused the rights another HIV+ person is given in MOST other citys in Canada!When will this BS stop?Y must i be treated like a criminal -especially when i have worked so hard on developeing my personal skills (with great help from the Ontario Aids Network)& as i have applied for a position of research asisstent,i was thinking that this was the most promising year of all.Its going to be another drawn out battle,where the stress will take its tole,as it always does to people.How bad my health suffers because of all this bullshit is a question i cannot answer right now,as i am in great health except for my tooth(killin me)& i plan to take care of that soon=tooth out!Y do i suffer needless pain?My fear of dentists runs deep these days!That & my fear of losing my freedom.I am NOT afraid of jail,as its a place that ,sad to say,i am used to.There were a few xmas's spent inside lookin out,& its not pretty i must admit.depression runs so deep n cold at xmas time in jails all over the planet.Folks inside lose hope at this time of yr when they are inside,& the depression grows all the more.I thank GOD i am not there today.but,he maybe sending me back,to talk to someone,who know's?GOD works in mysterious ways but he does work.I know this for a fact folks.I have seen alot of stuff & much of it not very pretty.But,in the end,my faith & hope is in HIM,GOD,so who can stand against me?Is Christian faith any stronger or weaker then the muslim faith?How about the Buddists?Does GOD love 1 race more then any other?I am NOT GOD so i dont know these answers.I think its in the seeking that we find GOD!LOVE one another,as i have loved YOU!Simple enough commandment eh folks>?PEACE,LOVE,& HAPPINESS TO ALL MEN & WOMAN ON EARTH!!!& have a great day eh!

I Buy a QP of Weed /month=dont smoke i don't EAT!

& i kinda like ating myself,but living with HIV-AIDs U tend to get alot of NASEA!Smokin pot helps alieviate this ,& helps my eating as well,relaxing & soothing at the end of the day.It should be made LEGAL & TAXED!THIS WOULD ENABLE US TO 1)PAY OFF DEFICIT,2)PAY FOR HEALTHCARE,3)DEFENCE,4)OFFENCE & ANY OTHER FENCES THAT NEEDED FIXIN!I MEAN REALLY Y NOT MAKE LEGAL FOR THOSE OF US THAT R SICK,SLOWLY DYEING,CANCER ^& THE MANY OTHER AILMENTS THAT PUFFIN WEED HELPS US ALL LIVE A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE!PEACE,LOVE & HAPPINESS TO U ALL EH!JESUS SAVES SO BELIEVE & BE SAVED!

HIV-AIDS SURVEY FOR HIV+ GAY PEOPLES!!!

http://www.web-research-online.com/dash3/DashLogin?id=rd884b2 FOR A CHANCE TO WIN AN IPOD FILL THIS SURVEY OUT & U MIGHT WIN!!!

HIV-AIDS STIGMA & DISCRIMINATION

Being HIV+ in today's day & age should be relatively easy,however it isn't.Stigma & discrimination are still alive & doing well .U would think this would NOT be the case & u would be sooo wrong!As a person that goes into places of learning to tell my life story in the hopes that someone will think 2 before stickin a needle into his/her vain!Y humans have to learn by trial & error is beyound me,but thats how it is.Peoples have to find out for themselves how stuff works or dont work.getting up in front of crowds isnt the easiest thing to do for anyone,let out someone's life mistakes in the hopes that others will learn from it -i am thinking that ther must be a better way to get the word out to others with HIV-on how to encourage other PHA's to start Blogs,vlogs & viseo's 2 is my new dream.Maybe i can turn HIV blogging into a short course for PHA's to take & become empowered to do more.So many good peoples R doing great work in helping beat back stigma & discrimination that abounds in society today.Many folks R just trying to get by doing the best they can with what they have,repeating the same thing daily,as most folks like to stay in their comfort zones,this is where true leaders shine,as they encourage others to press ever onwards *& upwards ,to strive to be better persons in society,to help our fellow man,to love one another,as we were comanded to do by our Lord & Saviour Jesus Christ so long ago.We R learning things faster then they can be typed & added to our ever growing knowledge banks.We R growing too fast & i fear we R heading to world crisis situatuations.So many peoples R dyeing in africa that they R losing a small city each day,=6,000 lives lost just because of water,& poverty.We PHAs must stand up & start to do anything we can to help change this!PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS EH FOKLKS!PS. As i am single & live alone,taking it day by day ,i try to understand Y & how we can allow others to remain in poverty?Water in everywhere in Canada,& the thought of a water shortage is furthest from canadian men & womans minds.We have become complacent,we turn the tap & water comes out so we take it for granted that it will always be there working the way it was designed to work.GOD,our creator,& His Son Jesus Christ,have only our best interests at heart,& i pray that GOD's will be done & NOT man 's.We R 2 bent on killing each other,or taking wat is not our's.Like the Virus in me,we R spreading about the earth like a cancer,stripping the earth bare of life,& sucking all the minerals & anything else we think of.We must evolve into better peoples,more earth friendly & think GREEN & keep CLEAN!!!

MOM SLOWLY DIEING IN PLUMMER HOSPITAL IN SSM,

as i gaze at the full moon,shining yellow tonight,i am alone ,all my brothers have girlfriends or wife to help them deal with this,&,like always,its late at night when i am all alone lyeing in bed-a huge bed with no one but myself ,making it feel all the more blatent-being single has had its good points mind...still,nothing cam replace the warm touch of a female that cares for you,or holding her hand when your walking watching the sun set slowly.I am off to SSM this friday as theres to be a family meeting with the Dr. at 130 on sat.Jehova GOD grant be the perserverence to overcome,in Jesus Christ's name i pray ,Amen!!!PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS !~!~TODAY HAS BEEN ROUGH SO I STAYED INSIDE ALL DAY-NERVES R NOT GOOD=STRESS CAN HAVE A NEG AFFECT ON HEALTH & IMMUNE SYSTEMS,SO I AM TRYING NOT TO STRESS OUT TOO MUCH BUT WHAT CAN I SAY MY MOM IS SLOWLY DYEING IN SSM HOSP. & WE SHOULD GET THERE ASAP AND TO MAKE THINGS EVEN WORSE I LOST MY CAM-CORDER THAT HAS MOM SAYING SHE LOVES GARY,RON,STEVE,MIKE,JOEY, & THIS WILL BE VALUABLE TO THE BOYS! i HOPE SOMEONE AT THE HOSP IS HONEST ENOUGH TO TURN IT OVER.A GUARD IS CHECKIN IT OUT NOW BUT I HAVE A SINKING FEELING THAT A;LL OS LOST NOT ONLY WITH THE CAM-C0RDER BUT MY MOM AS WELL.DEPRESSION IS TRYING TO BRING ME DOWN BIGTIME & I TRY TURNING THE TV ONTO COMEDY OR LEARNING CHANNEL.BRO SAYS MOM SMILES WHEN SOMEONE WALKS INTO THE ROOM,SO ,SHE STILL CAN DO A FEW THINGS,ALTHOUGH NOT MUCH AND SO IF GOD IS WITH FOLKS THAT R DOWN & DEPRESSED AND PEOPLES CLOSE TO DEATH,THEN SURELY THOU ART WITH ME & MY FAMILY,WE ALL PLACE OUR TRUST ON THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY,CREATOR OS THE HEAVENS & THE EARTHS,AND THE HELLS AS WELL,RULAR OF THE UNIVERSES KNOWN & UNKNOWNS,& HIS SON ,JESUS THE CHRIST,MAN'S LORD & SAVIOUR,GIVE ME PERSERVERENCE TO OVERCOME THIS TIME OF TROUBLES,THIS END TIMES.MAY GOD'S WILL BE DONE & NOT MAN'S WILL,IN JESUS THE CHRIST;S NAME I PRAY TODAY,THURSDAY,FEB 21 2008 7:50 PMshe knows we love her,but she is worried about me i think-as i am hiv+ i dont have anyone like the rest of the boys do.And its at night,when its the hardest,as i have no one to hold me or someone that i could hold so close & so tight,i dont think i would ever let them go again!!!loljk!~but i digress...this is a tough time for me-toughest i have had to face yet & i am failing i think.I cannot help it & the tears seems to come & go of their own violition,as i am now unable to control them anymore....i thought the so many deaths of close loved ones woulda prepared me for this life altering event but nay,it didst not & has had the effect as a hammer striking my chest full,leaving me gasping for air-that will not come-even though i am now blue in colour and everything is starting to close in...i am falling...splash!!!time to wake up eh folks!!!life sucks & then life is great-u have to catch it when its in the middle to enjoy it.PEACE N LOVE NOT WARS N WALLS & JESUS SAVES SO BELIEVE & BE SAVED EH FOLKS~!~!
Posted by james(joey)gough

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